patienter: to wait; hold on the phone (v.)

Pouvez-vous patienter monsieur? Could you hold please sir? Pronounced: "paw-see-awn-tay" Note: this is phrase is très common in Québec, but not really used in France.

éperdu: distracted (adj)

Quand il pense fort, il devient un peu épardu. When he thinks hard, he becomes a bit distracted. Pronounced: "ay-pair-doo" Note éperdu de joie: wild with delight

le pneu: tire (n.)

Les pneus lacérés sont partout sur les autoroutes. Shredded tires are everywhere on the highways. Pronounced: "puh-nuh" Note Culturelle: It is customary when driving on the highways in France to move over to the right after passing cars. Rarely does a car camp out in the left lane of traffic on the autoroutes like we do in the states. Speed limits signs are in kilometers by the way, they don't use our awesome imperial system. It's not necessary to have a separate driver's license when driving in France or the rest of Europe. Ours work just fine contrary to what many travel agencies state.

le canapé: couch (n.)

Sprizee vient d'acheté un nouveau canapé d'Ikea. Sprizee just bought a new couch at Ikea. Pronounced: "kaw-naw-pay" [enter Sprizee stage right] I. Feel. Like. Such. An. Adult. All weekend, everytime I walked into the living room I found myself saying, "Man, this is like a real apartment." Then, Sunday, after the St. Pat's Day Dash, I christen it with a nice long nap. And yes, I realize the previous two statments don't necessarily make any sense. Duh, it's me. I'm random and ungettable. Like Napoleon Dynamite. [exit Sprizee stage left]

le bavardage: gossip (n.)

J'ai entendu beaucoup de bavardage à propos de ma vie le week-end passé. I heard lots of gossip about my life last weekend. Pronounced: "baw-vawr-dawj"

un hors-la-loi: an outlaw (n.)

Je suis un hors-la-loi depuis j'ai volé le petit chien de Paris Hilton. I'm an outlaw ever since I stole Paris Hilton's little dog. Pronounced: "oars-law-lwoy"

cuver: to ferment (v.)

L'humanité est une vieille ivrognesse qui, pour le moment, cuve sa dernière guerre. Humanity is an old drunkard who, for the moment, sleeps off its last war. Pronounced: "coo-vay" Other uses: cuver son vin: to ferment one's wine; to sleep it off cuver sa colère: to sleep, work; or walk off one's anger; to simmer down

le caprice: a whim (n.)

Aujourd'hui, j'ai un caprice pour un collègue. Today I took a fancy to a co-worker of mine. Pronounced: "caw-preece" Other uses: temps capricieux: changeable weather les caprices de la mode: the vageries of fashion faire quelque chose par caprice: to do something on an impulse avoir des caprices: to be moody avoir un caprice pour quelqu'un: to take a passing fancy to someone

faire le bouffon: to be facetious (v.)

Quand je parlais avec ma mère, je fais le bouffon souvent. C'est pourquoi elle pense que je suis un bon malin. When speaking with my mom, I am often facetious. That's why she thinks I'm a smart ass. Pronounced: "fare-luh-boof-awn"

la déception: disappointment (n.)

Le dîner était horrible. Quelle déception! The dinner was horrible. What a disappointment! Pronounced: "day-sep-see-own" Grammar note: If you want to say the English term deception then you should use tromperie or the verb tromper. Pixies fans should recognize trompe from an album of theirs titled Trompe le Monde which literally means deceive the world or deceive everyone. A common expression in French is "Oh, je suis désolé, j'ai trompé le numéro." That's how you say "Oh, I'm sorry, I misdialed the phone number."

un maillot de bain: bathing suit (n.)

Je ne porte pas un maillot de bain quand je nage. I don't wear a swimsuit when I swim. Pronounced: "my-oh-duh-ban"

un rot: a belch (n.)

As-tu entendu le rot? Oui, je suis responsable pour le bruit et je suis fier de moi. Did you hear the belch? Yes, I am responsible for the noise and I'm proud of myself. Pronounced: "row"* *(with lots of nasal)

le congé de maternité: maternity leave (n.)

Je souhaite que je puisse avoir un congé de maternité, cependant je suis un homme. I wish I could have maternity leave, nevertheless I am a man. Pronounced: "con-jay-de-maw-ter-nee-tay"